Monday, August 11, 2014

Feminists and Attractiveness

InsanityBytes22 writes:
There’s a new hashtag in the never ending feminist wars, #feministsareugly. In the chaos that is the Mad Hatter’s Tea Party, this was allegedly introduced by a couple of feminists. (Don’t ask me to explain, unless I start nibbling on a giant red mushroom, it’s not going to make sense.)

A prominent feminist meme is that the patriarchy oppresses women by obsessing over our appearance and always finding us lacking. They, the patriarchy, allegedly [set] this beauty standard we can never achieve, and [then] men supposedly constantly mock and ridicule us. Fat shaming and then shaming people for fat shaming, is a big part of feminism these days.

I was talking to some women my age today and this issue came up, just “who” shames us for our appearance?? I kid you not, not one of us could ever recall a man saying anything negative at all. Not once, in our entire lifetimes. I’m not saying it never happens, I don’t hang out in locker rooms. Maybe men spend all their time mocking the way women look, I have no idea. The thing is, not one of us could recall a single moment of wounding inflicted by some man. We have all gained and lost weight, gone to the grocery store in pajamas and bunny slippers, forgot to brush our hair, one woman even once forgot her front teeth. Not. one. single. incident.

Ah, but the world of women, now that can be a vicious place. We all had layer upon layer of scars inflicted by other women telling us we’re too smart, too fat, too thin, too stupid, too ugly. Our mothers, our sisters, our classmates, neighbors, co-workers. Even hiding behind #feministsareugly is that never ending sexual competitiveness that drives women to obsess over other women’s appearance. Think mean girls, bullying in junior high, office politics, the movie Carrie. Let me tell you, women ain’t so kind to other women.

Sugar and spice and everything nice, indeed. Just who do they think they’re fooling??
That's a great anecdotal observation, and one that I share. I've even seen attractive girls encouraging boys to join them in their mockery of an unpopular girl/girls, and using their looks and charms to incite the desired male support, often at great effort (although the boys never ended up actually making comments specifically about appearance; even when enticed to join in the bashing, they focused on the target's behavior, rather than appearance). It even happens inside the home; my best girlfriend's husband will swoon over how beautiful their daughter is when she's just woken up in the morning, while my girlfriend is immediately falling over herself to brush her daughter's hair, scrub her face, change her into decorative clothes, and put in hair ribbons!

The counterpart for non-western society is in some Muslim and/or African communities, where it is primarily women who insist upon mutilating ("circumcising") their daughters. Fresh-minted western feminists often get their minds blown when they discover that grandmothers, mothers, female relatives and friends are all violently insistent upon cutting apart their daughters' vulvas, while most of the local men shrug and are easily willing to accept the non-cutting idea in exchange for a few "anthropology study" dollars.

An observant supercomputer would probably essentially validate your personal experience as to the whole of human history, but feminists find a simple way around it--they will just say that magazines and TV programs are produced by men, and that it is the influence of those men that causes said magazines/programs to create a climate where appearance is important. Therefore, it's all the fault of men even if men aren't actually saying anything to women. Even in the "female genital cutting" case (that's the PC term for child genital mutilation in third-world societies, like "circumcision" is in America), researchers find systematic ways to blame the issue on men for exerting a nebulous influence on the process. Of course, fashion designers are mostly women or effeminate men, and heterosexual male majorities consistently rate fashion models as less attractive than plenty of other kinds of women (and vote with their wallets when it comes to whom they prefer seeing in porn), but still this weird female sexual arms race gets pinned on men, as though they actually prefer austere beanpoles wearing a pound of bronzing solution and the expressions of a starved dominatrix.

As to looks of models in magazines and TV programs, all the idiot businessmen are doing is relying on focus group results, rather than personal preferences, and permitting their layout editors to run with whatever makes supermarket-goers waste $5 absorbing the conformist mindset. If it were really about "looks" preferences, men would design a society where a third of the women wore burqas, a third bikinis or cheerleader outfits, and the other third a great pile of garters, petticoats, lace, and dresses. There'd be no fashion shows, no department stores, and none of those thousand-dollar dresses that look like IKEA end-table lamps.


  1. Truer words have never been spoken:

    "If it were really about "looks" preferences, men would design a society where a third of the women wore burqas, a third bikinis or cheerleader outfits, and the other third a great pile of garters, petticoats, lace, and dresses."

    1. It's its own small tragedy, in a way, that western people don't seem to realize how sexy a burqa can be. Despite all their nun-fantasies, they completely missed the burqa flight.

    2. I don't know how is it even possible to not realize how sexy a burqa is, even if the assessment is limited to the purely obvious and sensual (e.g. silhouette, eyes, etc.) and neglects all other innuendos...

      Besides, there is nothing inherently muslim in the burqas/heavy veiling. The greeks did it, the far easterners did it.

      Even more absurd is the current equation of the burqa with female opression. Historically, it is exaclty the opposite - the burqas allowed for the distinction between the 'honorable women' and the hookers. A woman would be punished not for not wearing g a burqa, but for wearing one without being entitled to do so. (this arrangement has its own problems, but still, a lot of veiled muslim women today can give bourgeois feminist ladies a good spanking with no sweat.

  2. Thank you for the reblog. I'm glad you enjoyed the post.

    You have an interesting perspective on things that I find rather refreshing. As to thousand dollar dresses that look like Ikea table lamps, I recently saw one that had a giant fried egg sown on the front of it. I have no idea what that means, I just found it amusing.

    1. Hope it didn't cost a grand. Guess it depends on the designer...